BULLIED BY THE GOVERNMENT

“I want everybody treated fairly in this country. We have never gone wrong when we expanded rights and responsibilities to everybody.”

Those were the words of President Barack Obama in May, 2012, when he stated his current position on gay marriage. Although marriage between two people of the same gender is illegal at the federal level and he once opposed it, in this election year Obama’s opinion has “evolved” and he has come to believe the law should be changed.

Even if the federal prohibition remains in place, those couples who wed in states where gay marriage is legal would probably not be charged with a federal offense, or worse, die as a direct result of breaking this federal law.

There is another federal law against an action that is legal in some states, but, nevertheless, subjects people to unfair treatment. Enforcing that federal law could result in death, or at the very least, in a compromised quality of life for some citizens. President Obama, however, disagrees with changing this law and is even going out of his way to use the powers of government to enforce it.

This law is the federal prohibition against the cultivation and use of medical marijuana. With regard to this natural plant, the federal government and President Obama are casting themselves in the role of big-time bullies. This, despite candidate Obama’s 2008 statement that medical cannabis was an issue best left to state and local governments. “I’m not going to be using Justice Department resources to try to circumvent state laws on this issue,” he vowed.

Then he won the election, and gradually that policy changed. Over the past year or so, there has been a crackdown on medical marijuana in the sixteen states and the District of Columbia where the plant is legal.

Can you say hypocritical?

Since Obama has admitted to being a user of marijuana himself as a young man, can you say it louder? HYPOCRITICAL!

A new biography by David Maraniss, Barack Obama: The Story, details the extent of Obama’s involvement with the drug. He was a member of a group in Hawaii called the “Choom Gang.” (Choom is a slang term for pot.) According to Maraniss’s book, Obama and his friends figured out how to get the most out of their cannabis experience. They would close themselves up in a van they called “the Choomwagon” and fill it with smoke to get total absorption, or what they referred to as “TA.”

Realizing that over 70 percent of the country’s population supports medical marijuana and 56 percent supports the legalization of marijuana, period, even House Minority Leader, Nancy Pelosi, disagrees with Obama, announcing, “I have strong concerns about the recent actions by the federal government that threaten the safe access of medicinal marijuana to alleviate the suffering of patients in California and undermine a policy that has been in place under which the federal government did not pursue individuals whose actions complied with state laws providing for medicinal marijuana.” (May 2, 2012)

It’s not only the legal users of cannabis who are being targeted. Even landlords who dare to rent to legal cannabis dispensaries are threatened with having their property seized.

On October 27, 1964, nearly fifty years ago, President Reagan said:

“What does it mean whether you hold the deed or the title to your business or property if the government holds the power of life and death over that business or property? Such machinery already exists. The government can find some charge to bring against any concern it chooses to prosecute. Every businessman has his own tale of harassment. Somewhere a perversion has taken place. Our natural, inalienable rights are now considered to be a dispensation of government, and freedom has never been so fragile, so close to slipping from our grasp as it is at this moment.”

Perversion, indeed. Since Obama took office, government agents have raided “more than 200″ state-approved medical marijuana facilities, according to Kris Hermes, spokesperson for Americans for Safe Access (ASA), including an IRS/DEA raid on Oaksterdam, a medical marijuana training school that taught everything from horticulture to business to the legal ins-and-outs of running a dispensary. It did not distribute marijuana. (Can you say freedom of speech?)

The side effects of legal prescription drugs make cannabis look as dangerous as a marshmallow. According to the Journal of the American Medical Association, in 1998, 106,000 American’s died from prescription drugs. (Ambien + Jr. Seau = Suicide?) Even the side effects of some over-the-counter drugs such as Aleve can be dangerous.

Alcohol is legal. But according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), it kills nearly 75,000 Americans every year. This figure does not include homicides where alcohol is involved. Nor does it mention the millions of other lives ruined by an alcoholic’s addiction.

Again according to the CDC, cigarettes “account for an estimated 443,000 deaths, or nearly one of every five deaths, each year in the United States. More deaths are caused each year by tobacco use than by all deaths from human immunodeficiency virus (HIV), illegal drug use, alcohol use, motor vehicle injuries, suicides, and murders combined.”

Over many thousands of years of use, how many deaths have been proven to be directly caused by marijuana? Answer: Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada.

Can you say irony?

Once, cannabis was a respected component in a physician’s arsenal. And, as with prescription drugs and alcohol, cannabis has different effects on different people. If a minority of users experience irritability, hyperactivity, etc., is that a legitimate reason for keeping it illegal? If the answer is yes, why aren’t prescription drugs that actually kill people banned? Why isn’t alcohol banned? Tobacco?

Can you say big bucks?

Antique cannabis bottle

Can it be that the drug companies can’t make a profit from cannabis? At least not yet, although the pharmaceutical industry is likely working frantically to isolate all the hundreds of useful compounds in cannabis in order to produce them synthetically, patent them, and make billions of dollars from them. They already market one compound, THC, the psychoactive ingredient in cannabis, sold as Marinol, which is expensive and produces marginal results. There are, however, hundreds of other compounds present in this miraculous plant, one we can grow for free in our back yards, one that might be a cure for cancer and other miserable diseases. Why isolate those compounds when they might be more effective working together? Again, can you say big bucks?

Did you know that:

  • there are ways to use cannabis other than smoking it so that the plant is non-psychoactive, i.e., you won’t get high? These include juicing the raw plant or using a single drop of cannabis oil daily.
  • your brain naturally forms compounds similar to those found in marijuana?
  • early Christians used a form of cannabis oil in baptisms?
  • Queen Victoria was an avid smoker of pot and lived to be 81?
  • marijuana has cured cancer, including skin cancer and the brain tumor of an infant—after the medical establishment had sent him home to die?
  • until 1992 the U.S. government grew and provided marijuana to patients in the Federal Investigational New Drug Program? One man, Irvine Rosenthal, is still in the program. Every month the government supplies him with 300 marijuana cigarettes. It has been doing so for nearly 30 years. (Again, can you say hypocritical?)
  • according to a new study from the University of Colorado−Denver, between 1990 and  2009, the 16 states that have legalized medical marijuana have seen an average 9 percent drop in traffic deaths since their medical marijuana laws took effect?

I could continue indefinitely with interesting facts about this amazing plant, but it is not my intent to give a lesson on cannabis, only to point out how the government bullies its citizens in this matter and to raise the awareness of those who believe the tales told about the “evil” weed, of which I used to be one, until I did my research. There is plenty of information already available to those with minds open enough to seek it and I have included some links in this post.

Another question: If smoking marijuana is as debilitating as the “experts” would have us believe, how did Barack Obama ever rise to the office of president? Since pot is touted as a gateway drug, he should be a babbling heroin addict or, since it kills motivation, he should be sitting in a corner somewhere dreamily contemplating a blossom and saying, “Du-u-de.” Those against the use of cannabis in any form would likely be amazed to learn how many very successful and professional people use it on a regular basis. Most of them have to break the law to do so.

I do not use marijuana, either medicinally or recreationally. But someone I love does. I believe that person would not be alive without it. So far, that person is using it legally, although it is becoming more difficult to get and more expensive, thanks to the government crackdown. If the government continues down the path it is currently on, that person will likely have a decision to make: break the law or die.

Hmmmm …. Eenie, meenie, miney, mo. Let’s think—for about a nanosecond. If it comes to that, this law-abiding citizen will help my loved one break the law. It’s a nonsensical, unjustifiable, antiquated law that needs to go.

But meantime, will President Obama, the Department of Justice, and the DEA continue gunning for those hurting people who are helped by medical marijuana?

I’m told by some that the president has no power to change the way the Department of Justice enforces the law regarding marijuana. I have difficulty believing that, unless, of course, he’s held in check by the power of the mighty pharmaceutical industry.

“I want everybody treated fairly in this country. We have never gone wrong when we expanded rights and responsibilities to everybody.”

It’s time for the president to walk the walk, not just talk the talk. It’s time for opinion on cannabis to evolve, the way it has with gay marriage. It’s time.

Otherwise, can you say BULLYING?

I strongly urge everyone to become educated on this subject. For an objective look, watch this September 15, 2011 video documentary “All New Cannabis Documentary.” It’s long, but worth your while, especially if you watch with an open mind.

Another eye-opening documentary is “Cannabis Cured Cancer,” narrated by Peter Coyote, which addresses whether or not the chemicals found in marijuana can prevent and heal deadly cancers and replace debilitating drugs. World-renowned scientists in the field of cannabinoid research explain and illustrate their discoveries about this ancient medicine.

To learn about juicing the fresh marijuana plant, watch “Leaf.”

“Cured, A Cannabis Story” tells how one man cured his skin cancer with the use of cannabis oil.

“Run From the Cure” describes the effects of using cannabis oil by people with brain tumors.

Please take the time to watch these videos and read the myriad of information available to seekers. No one should have to live in fear that their own government will keep them from using the plant that keeps them functioning or alive.

Yes, President Obama, it’s time to expand rights and responsibilities to all citizens of this country. It’s time to treat everyone fairly.

It’s time.

Otherwise, it’s simply bullying.

REMEMBERING DANIEL CHEN ET AL

On this Memorial Day, in addition to the fallen and those currently serving the United States around the globe, I honor those military personnel who have endured bullying at the hands of their fellow soldiers. People such as Daniel Chen, about whom I wrote in earlier post called Be All That You Can Be, But Don’t Be Asian. If you missed it, please check it out. He and others like him should not be forgotten on a day we honor our military.

TIM GUNN

 

I was planning to post what some might consider a more controversial article today, but it’s not finished to my satisfaction. I want it to be objective and thorough, so I’m going to do some more thinking, writing, and revising. In the meantime, I’m posting this message from Tim Gunn,  compassionate mentor to the Project Runway competitors. You rock, Tim!

MY DOG WAS BULLIED

Since, in addition to raising awareness of bullying, a secondary goal of this blog is to promote my book, BULLY AT AMBUSH CORNER, today I’m indulging that goal by posting a promotional video I made last week, with our dog, Teddy, as the main character. Although the aim of the video is to increase sales of my e-book, there is a definite link to bullying. And, as my book has a touch of humor, so, too, does the video. I hope you enjoy it and will like it, share it, or do whatever you can to increase views.

I believe BULLY AT AMBUSH CORNER is a book that should be read by all middle grade readers. It helps them understand the victims and the bullies alike, touches on being a pacifist, on music, and on family relationships. In one reviewer’s words:  “The book is beautifully written with wonderful descriptions and vivid metaphors. The characters–Rocky’s older pugnacious sister, his friend Mario, a Mexican immigrant who has seen more violence than he cares to remember, Tink who is starved for her parents’ love and approval–are believable and lovable.”

Please watch the video. Like it. Share it. Then buy the book from Amazon by clicking here:  BULLY AT AMBUSH CORNER.

Or at any other digital bookstore of your choice found in the “To Order” tab above.

CARTOON NETWORK’S STOP BULLYING CAMPAIGN

You don’t think about the Cartoon Network in relation to bullying, unless it’s the shenanigans that go on between Tom and Jerry or other roughhousing characters. But the network is doing its part to combat bullying, with a portion of its  website dedicated to that effort. Young people can go to the STOP BULLYING, SPEAK UP site to watch videos about how to stop bullying (subtitled in Spanish and Farsi), can earn collectible badges by speaking out against bullying, and can even design a comic of their own. There is a checklist and guide for educators, a guide for parents, a timeline and strategies for launching bullying prevention initiatives, a poster to download, suggested reading (all from Simon and Schuster), and even a poll.

Even though it’s ironic that the Cartoon Network with its bonk ’em bash ’em cartoon mayhem is stepping up to prevent bullying, I recommend the site for anyone who wants to join the fight. It’s a site where young people especially can learn and have fun at the same time. And when it’s fun, learning sticks.

DEPRESSION OR BULLYING: WHICH COMES FIRST?

Chicken or egg? Depression or bullying? Which comes first?

When I was bullied for a short time in fifth grade, I felt anxious and hurt, but not depressed. It was over too quickly. But if the bullying had continued for weeks, or months, or, as with the case for some children, for years, no doubt I would have fallen into the dark pit of despair.

Or would I? The connection between depression and bullying appears to be a tangled knot of cause and effect.

It seems logical that children who are ostracized by their peers and bullied will become depressed. Now new research suggests that the reverse might be true: a child who appears depressed is more likely to be bullied. If a child appears to have low energy, is socially withdrawn or passive, cries excessively, or views himself negatively, all signs of depression, all behaviors which might make others less likely to hang around them, that child is more likely to become a target. This appears to be particularly true for fourth graders.

Acting depressed is similar to submissive behavior in the animal world, where animals who are lower in the hierarchy are picked on, such as the chickens I described in my post “Animal Bullies.” And bullying reflects the dominant behavior of higher-order animals in the hierarchy, such as that of the monk seal in the same post.

So children suffering from depression show visible signs of having a lower status, which attracts the attention of bullies, who choose weak victims who won’t fight back. “Bullies target youth who are unlikely to fight back,” according to Karen P. Kochel, Ph.D., an assistant research professor at Arizona State University, in Phoenix. “Youth who are depressed really have the potential to appear vulnerable, and are easy marks for victimization, unfortunately.”  So with the depression comes bullying, which, in turn, can likely increase the depression.

The message seems to be that parents and teachers need to be observant of a child’s emotional state, particularly around the fourth grade. Since a child who appears depressed has a better chance of being bullied, it’s important for that child to receive treatment before the bullies zero in on him or her. Learning how to socialize more effectively should help. What might help most, though, according to Dr. Kochel, is having a friend. “Even just having one good friend can really be a buffer against victimization—or depression, for that matter,” she says. “If kids are able to establish one solid friendship, that can be a real protective factor for them.”

A friend. So simple. So important. And for some children, especially one who is depressed, such a challenge.

If you were bullied, did you end up suffering from depression?

Or, did you suffer from depression and end up being bullied?

Chicken or egg? Depression or bullying? What comes first? Your opinion?

STOP BULLYING: A METHOD THAT WORKS

Kyle, age 7, didn’t want to go to school. He refused to tell his parents or teachers why he didn’t want to be there. When the truth finally came out, his parents learned that every day since kindergarten Kyle had been bullied by another boy. Fortunately, before they even knew about the bullying, Kyle’s parents were wise enough to recognize their son needed help and engaged a therapist. After thirty minutes of treatment, Kyle felt relief and his confidence increased. A few more treatments over the next month changed Kyle’s attitude and his life. That quickly, bullying was no longer a problem for him.

The treatment Kyle’s therapist used is called EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), an energy therapy that has proven to be extremely successful in treating post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in returning vets or in anyone who has experienced severe trauma, either psychological or physical. I doubt anyone familiar with the effects of bullying would disagree that victims suffer PTSD. And like military personnel who find relief with EFT, targets of bullying who receive the treatment are recovering from the trauma of being bullied.

Developed by Gary Craig, EFT utilizes the body’s energy meridian points. These meridian points are stimulated by tapping on them with your fingertips, which taps into your body’s own energy and healing power. Children, with their open minds and love for games, enjoy EFT, especially if some humor can be injected into the process. For them, it becomes “The Tapping Game.” The best thing about the technique is that the procedure is fast and simple. You can teach it to yourself by watching training videos, which also makes it free or at least inexpensive, since people who don’t want to learn the method themselves or prefer to use an expert, can hire a trained therapist.

To learn about EFT or to locate a therapist, go to EFT Universe, where free tutorials are available, as well as DVDs and books. You can also search the site’s archives for articles on treating victims of bullying. Read more about Kyle’s experiences in the article “EFT Heals 7-Year-Old Bullying Victim’s Trauma.”

You can access an article by a practitioner who used EFT with her son who was being teased about his freckles and red hair in “Children’s Issues.”

More information is available in “Invisible Wounds” in Psychology Today, which discusses energy therapies—including EFT—that are being used to defuse bad memories.

Children can access a simple, illustrated script called “Overcoming (Cyber)Bullying With EFT” that they can use to teach themselves the technique.

The following is a video demonstration by practitioner Brad Yates of the technique for young people, with a specific focus on bullying:

In the video Taking a Stand, Part One, another practitioner, Joseph Anthony, uses EFT to help the bullies themselves.

In Part Two, Anthony addresses their victims, the bullied.

I am a strong advocate of EFT and have used it successfully to treat a variety of issues for myself and others. I am not, however, familiar with, and consequently do not endorse, any of the practitioners on these sites, but do want to make you aware of a few of the many resources available.

Emotional Freedom Technique. A technique that’s inexpensive, simple to learn and use. And it works! What could be better? Nothing. Except an end to bullying. And perhaps EFT might help with that.

If you or a loved one try EFT for bullying, or if you use it on your child, I’d love to hear from you.

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ADDED 5.3.2012:  A new book has been released, written by Jack Canfield (Chicken Soupseries) and Pamela (EFT expert), describing EFT. In Tapping into Ultimate Success, How to Overcome Any Obstacle & Skyrocket Your Results, EFT is described as “a new, cutting-edge technique . . .  to make achieving success easier than ever before. Meridian Tapping, sometimes known as Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), is a revolutionary new tool to remove the fears, doubts, and upsets that keep you from living according to your values and ideals. This book and DVD give you a step-by-step guide to overcoming any obstacle that is keeping you from success. If you’re familiar with tapping, you’ll love the fresh, transformative methods in this book. If you’re not yet familiar with these techniques that hundreds of thousands of individuals are using to transform their lives, you’ll love the ease and simplicity of these methods. With Tapping Into Ultimate Success, the rewards you’ve been looking for are literally at your fingertips.”

CROWDS FLOCK TO BULLY MOVIE & WATCHMEN GET THE CALL

A happy note: Doug Ratner and the Watchmen, about whom I blogged in my posts, “Down and Dirty” Rockers Take on Bullying, Rockers Against Bullying Get the Boot, and “Bomb” Takes Off, have been booked to open for the Spin Doctors. That means their songs that speak out against bullying, “Ghost in the Mirror” and “Bomb in the Backseat” are going to find a much wider audience. And that’s a good thing.

Another good thing: Now that the rating of the movie Bully has been lowered, hordes of young people are seeing it, more than 6000 in Los Angeles alone on Tuesday, April 17. Read about it in this article from the LA Times.

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By Teresa Watanabe, Los Angeles Times

April 18, 2012

Roosevelt High School student Jerry Gallegos knows the pain of being bullied — he said he was taunted as a “fatty” for years. Yet, when he saw others being harassed, he stood by silently, afraid others would turn on him.Now, Jerry said, he is determined to act against bullies and reach out to vulnerable students.”As one student, you can’t do much,” he said, “but every little bit helps.”His turnabout came after participating Tuesday in a mass viewing of the acclaimed documentary “Bully.” Billed as the largest youth gathering against bullying in California, the screening brought 6,500 students from 49 Los Angeles Unified School District campuses to the Nokia Theatre in downtown Los Angeles.As public concern about bullying rises, the Los Angeles Fund for Public Education sponsored the screening and a short panel discussion to educate students about the problem and inspire them to take action. Speakers included Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, L.A. Unified Supt. John Deasy and “Bully” director Lee Hirsch.Hirsch told students he was bullied “really badly” as a child and wanted to give voice to the countless youths abused each day. He urged students to write about their experiences with bullying and how they’re stepping up against it on Facebook, Twitter and other social media.

“This is where change begins — right here today,” he said. “Each and every one of you are change-makers.”

The students seemed ready to rise to the cause. They broke out in cheers and applause at numerous scenes showing five targeted youths and their families who voiced resolve to make a difference against bullying. Carson High School student Charles Dulce said he was inspired by the family of a bullying victim who committed suicide and by the campaign they launched, Stand for the Silent.

The filmmakers say 13 million children are bullied at school each year. L.A. Unified official Judy Chiasson cautioned that accurate data are difficult to gather because definitions of bullying range from an incidental push to a full-blown assault. National estimates of the percentage of children who have been bullied vary widely from 30% to 70%, said Chiasson, coordinator of the district’s office of human relations, diversity and equity.

“Everyone is on the lookout for bullies now,” Chiasson said. “Everybody is talking about it.”

In L.A. Unified, bullying complaints are usually handled at the school level and are not reported to the district’s central office unless the incident is deemed severe or pervasive, she said. But even if the scope of bullying is unclear, Chiasson said, every district school has been directed to address the problem in some way.

The Los Angeles School of Global Studies at the Miguel Contreras Learning Complex, for instance, has developed four levels of intervention, ranging from student sessions with counselors to meetings of staff, parents and the involved youths, according to Edwin Bachez, 16, a student at the campus.

“In our high school, if you bully, they really get on your case,” Edwin said.

On Monday, Carson High School was one of several campuses that prepared students for the film with exercises about bullying. History teacher Merri Weir asked students to write about their experiences with the problem. Confessions spilled out, some anonymously on Post-it notes and others publicly shared.

Murielle Alconcel, 17, spoke of her shame at failing to help a longtime friend who was being shunned by her group. Charles Dulce shared his pain over being taunted as fat, Carlo David for being an Asian American with glasses in a nearly all-Latino school, and another student for being gay. Alveena Aleem, a Muslim of Pakistani descent, said a classmate texted a taunt about the death of her “uncle”; when she asked who that was, he replied, “Osama bin Laden.”

The L.A. Fund contributed $225,000 to sponsor the screening and plans to announce a new grant program for anti-bullying programs, Executive Director Dan Chang said. Other contributors were the Weinstein Co., which distributed the film; and Anschutz Entertainment Group, whose president, Tim Leiweke, told students that he too had been bullied but that “life does turn out.”

That upbeat message was echoed by four student panelists, who suggested ways to create safe and welcoming school climates: Don’t be a bystander who allows bullying. Build relationships with teachers who can help. Be friends with students who look or act different. Reach out to new students and ask for their stories.

“That act of kindness can change their whole life,” said Roosevelt student Samantha Hernandez.

teresa.watanabe@latimes.com

Copyright © 2012, Los Angeles Times

(For the complete article, go here.)

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I haven’t been to the movie yet, but it’s definitely on my to-do list.

Have you seen it? What did you think? Will it change lives for the better or will its impact fade and we’ll see people going right back to picking on others?

MISHMASH

Today is a collection of items I want to bring to the reader’s attention.

Recently, in my post Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing—and Crying, I wrote about Dan’s suggestion that people reach out to the bullied and to the bullies with compassion. A recent “Funky Winkerbean” comic strip by Tom Batiuk has one character, Summer Moore, basketball star, stepping in and confronting a bully who is tormenting a classmate. Summer doesn’t exactly treat the bully with compassion, but she certainly helps the victim realize someone has his back—and that makes all the difference for him. I’m sure Dan Pearce would approve, although he would suggest someone also reach out the bully in order to learn what’s stoking his flames.

Becky Celestine (Wonderful name. Perhaps I’ll steal it if I ever need a nom de plume.) reached out to let me know about a site dealing with bullying in the workplace. You can read about it at Nine Signs There’s an Office Bully in Your Midst.

A new application for Facebook might bring the phrase “enemy someone” into play. EnemyGraph allows users to name their enemies on the social networking site. As explained in the Huffington Post on 3.30.12, “those who’ve installed EnemyGraph can choose ‘enemies’ from both their existing friends list as well as from a list of other users of the app. They can also choose to ‘enemy’ public figures and companies with pages, or, in the words of EnemyGraph, ‘pretty much anyone or anything on Facebook.’ ”

In my never-to-be-humble opinion, haters can always find a way to connect. Do we need an app that makes this easier, and, consequently, gives bullies an easy way to torment their targets? Read more at the Huffington Post.

A few of my posts introduced readers to Doug Ratner and the Watchmen, a rock and roll band that has released songs that target and attempt to end bullying—Down and Dirty Rockers Take on Bullying, Rockers Against Bullying Get the Boot,  and “Bomb” Takes Off.

Now we also have Drake Jensen, a Canadian country western singer and songwriter who is doing the same. Drake, too, has his own tale of being bullied: “… My small town was like a pack of wolves; they sniffed out the damaged ones and turned on them. I was that wolf that was different from everybody else …” These experiences drove Drake to release “Scars” (lyrics by Don Graham, music by Zita DaSilva). On the song’s site, it says, “Share this song and pass is on to others who might help the children now and in the future to no longer have to fight against bullies. The relief they need comes in many forms, from the understanding shoulder to cry on, to the responsible adult who stands for making this world a better and safer place for each new generation.” The proceeds from the download sales will be donated to Bullying.org. You can also listen to Drake speak out against bullying in this video and read more about him at Towleroad.

I came across an article describing Five Misunderstandings of Bullying that must be acknowledged in order to move from awareness to action. Number 1 states that bullies are not the source of the problem. According to the author of the article, Dr. Danah Boyd, a research fellow at the Born This Way Foundation, a senior researcher at Microsoft Research, and a research assistant professor at New York University, “many bullies have difficulties at home or in school, and need just as much help as those who are targets of and bystanders to bullying. Bullies are often victims in other contexts who are lashing out.” Read about the rest of the misunderstandings at the link above.

The Cartoon Network has a video named “Stop Bullying: Speak Up.” Kids can view it and other videos on line and earn badges for speaking out against bullying, as well as make and post their own bullying comic. The site also has an educator’s guide and a page for parents.

Now go out and make a difference.

LOVE, ALWAYS

I’m pleased that people are reaching out to me with their stories about being bullied. One of those, a young woman named Stephanie Diaz, is going even further by trying to raise money to donate to organizations that fight bullying. Read Stephanie’s story and check in on her website, Love, Always Couture. If you like what you see, support her cause.

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Bullying is a hot topic lately, and I could not be happier about that. For four years of my life—my high school years to be exact—I was bullied. Not just bullied, but torn apart, broken down. My first three years of high school were difficult, but it was not until my senior year that things became extremely difficult. I will never forget the boy who nearly ruined my senior year.

In eighth grade I had been diagnosed with a disorder called polycystic ovary syndrome, which is basically a fancy word for saying I could not get pregnant, or I would have extreme difficulty attempting to get pregnant. Another downside of this disorder is excessive facial hair growth. From middle school on, I had been getting laser hair removal services in order to hide the disorder I live with. Since this is a genetic disease, the hair always grows back, no matter what. Naturally, finding out I have such a disorder was absolutely devastating. But my classmate’s treatment was also devastating.

I guess that particular day in class I needed to go back for one of my hair removal sessions, and the boy happened to pick up on it. He thought it would be funny to make up a nickname for me, which was “goatee.” He called me this in front of everyone in the class, continuously. It was a nightmare. I would pretend I did not hear him, but I did. There was no way I could ignore the humiliation of the name. He paraded around the hallways screaming it whenever he saw me, making my life a living hell. I went to guidance and explained the situation in hopes that they would change my class. They said no, there was nowhere else to put me. Basically I was going to have to deal with the harsh words.

I started missing school, any excuse I could think of to skip that class. I started to miss pep rallies. I missed Grad Bash. I sat in the bathroom when there were events with even the slightest possibly that I would bump into him. I missed the Baccalaureate mass luncheon and I almost missed my prom, but my mom made me go. I was traumatized. When it came time for my graduation, I was petrified that he would scream something when I went up to get my diploma. My biggest fear was that he would start a cruel chant of some sort. To this day, I am almost certain that when I went up to get my diploma, I heard the word “goatee.” The day I graduated from high school was the best day of my life, because it was the last day I would ever have to see him again.

I hoped that once I graduated, I would just be able to forget. But that isn’t possible; I will never be able to forget, which is why I have decided to fight back. Since bullying is something that has truly affected my life, I have decided to create a “fashionable” look for others like myself. I recently launched a clothing line for victims and people strongly against bullying and, most importantly, to help put an end to bullying for good. Ten percent of all profits are donated to a different anti-bullying organization each month. This clothing line is the way I am coping with what happened to me. Here is the link to my website.

 Love, Always Couture

Thanks so much for taking a look,

Stephanie Diaz

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Before starting this blog, I had no idea so much was being done to end bullying. Sure, Stephanie’s contribution may not be as huge as that of Lady Gaga’s with her foundation and all her fame, but if each of us follows Stephanie’s example, together we can truly make a difference.

Brava, Stephanie! You go, girl!

(If any readers know of another individual or group raising money to donate to the bullying cause, please leave a comment. I’d love to spread the word.)